An Open Letter to Everyone Rich & Famous
Freddie Mercury's voice: Eyyyyyyy-O
I was gonna pull an Adam Sandler and start with a "whazzzzzaaaa" because that's how excited I am for the new year (I'm lying, of course) but I realized just because I'm demented doesn't mean I gotta sound demented too.
Yeah, gonna cut down on the bullshit and tell you like it is - the past couple days were super hard on me. No, I didn't starve or die or anything. Just the usual dysfunctional family bullcrap raining down my fantasy world. Depression is like listening to a Lana Del Rey song - you have no fucking idea what's it about, but its disturbing and calming at the same time, so you sorta go along with it. After three days of crying for no reason and staring contests with the ceiling, I put on my big girl panties, got on my laptop (which I've decided to call Ru by the way), and did what my middle class fam does - write long rants about why my life sucks, screen my messages and cry/shag myself to sleep . Because, you know, unlike rich people, we do not have the luxury of affording expensive shrinks and running off to exotic locations to get over a bad mood. I really wish we could, though. I'd like to see the world once before you rich people burn the globe down with your whims and fancies.
So, Morticia, what are you mad about today?
I'm mad at the world. No, I'm angry at the world. About everything that's going on and how people with the most money are least concerned with doing something, anything. You know why? I'll tell you why.
Because when everything ends, they won't. They'll buy their way into new beginnings.
Because while my brothers and sisters are out there in the cold - fighting the system with blood on their knees, they sit comfortably in their homes, pretending all is good.
Because when our world burns, and it will, they will already have moved into a new one- guess how: money.
And here we are, with blindfolds over our eyes, letting them tell us what's good for us, asking us to buy their 'almost a ho' cosmetics and the age old 'love yourself' propaganda. I feel sorry for all the people who've wasted their money buying all that Kylie Cosmetics/KKW crap because it is what it is - crap. And some of you are so fucking blind that one day you'll call Kylie out for pretending to wash her face using a product from her own beauty line, and buy even more products the next time they're launched, like your life depended on it. I mean - Bitch doesn't even use it herself and she tells you to buy it and you buy it?? What kind of stupid moron does that? You really think those people are talented or hard working? All they do is con people into buying their shit and misappropriate black culture. And don't even get me started about the time people in the US wanted to donate to Kylie Jenner's bank account so she could be the world's youngest billionaire. I mean, you would rather pay money to someone who's only accomplishment (if you can even call it that) was getting pregnant at 19 than donate to something which counts as a real problem - like people dying of starvation, or not getting vaccinated because of limited resources, or women getting infections from using cloth napkins during periods. Is that the standard you want to set in young women of today - get pregnant at 19? Wow.
Have you ever imagined what would happen if you chose to buy from a local store instead of people whose brain size is inversely proportional to the sizes of their rears and who claim to call themselves 'entrepreneurs'? The money you pay for almost 5 times cheaper cosmetics would go into paying a kid's school fee, or buying them fresh fruits, or getting them a proper, balanced meal. But na, why do that when you can line up the wallets of the already rich assholes who wouldn't give a shit if your family got killed in a nuclear blast tomorrow? Yeah. Do that.
And I'm not just after the Kardashian/Jenners. Like I said - they personally have no fucking clue about what they're supposed to be doing. They're just a marketing by-product birthed by their mom-ager Kris. I want to drag every big name who ever had a chance to make the difference and chose to keep their piehole shut so as to not align themselves with a side or be politically incorrect.
Maybe not all celebrities are like that. Let's talk about the most recent example - Jennifer Aniston, Cate Blanchett and Joaquin Phoenix took the Golden Globes' podium to talk about climate change and the Australian bushfires. Phoenix also went a step ahead and asked his fellow glitterati to refrain from taking their private jets to Palm Springs and other award ceremony destinations. Also, did you know that private jets account for about FORTY TIMES more pollution of the air than commercial aircrafts?(here's the source) I don't know about you, but this makes me really mad. I mean, not taking public transport is one thing, but being responsible for emanating carbon emissions which are more than an entire village combined is a totally different ballgame. Do you realize you're being poisoned for free - so that the 1% of the population can afford the most luxurious air travel? Does that make you mad? It fucking should.
And by the way, if you think I'm impressed or in awe or admiration of these people speaking about something important for a change - I'm not. Would you admire a dentist for filling out the cavities in your teeth? No, right? And why is that? Because it's their goddamn job.
But this is what most of these shitty people do - a statement here and a tweet there - but nothing with substantial weight. Of course, I'm not generalizing here there are some amazing people out there doing Satan's good work, but you're not a toddler. I don't have to explain everything to you. They're just - to put in Mr. Shashi Tharoor's words, 'exasperating farrago of distortions, misrepresentations and outright lies'.
You'd think that when there are millions and billions of people following you and looking up to you, you'd make use of that kind of power and do something worthwhile - like poverty eradication or speak about how fundamental rights are in the gutter or how the governments are so freely indulging in privacy violation; instead, bitches just open beauty/clothing/fragrance lines. What the fuck?
And even though I hate Ricky Gervais for being an entitled white asshole who makes sexist and homophobic comments every now and then, I respect him for calling these people out in his seven minute long opening monologue at the Globes(watch it here). In particular, he talked about how Apple had jumped into the streaming biz with the likes of The Morning Show ( starring our favorites - Reese Witherspoon, Steve Carell and Jennifer Aniston) - a show that talks about dignity and doing the right thing while their employer runs sweatshops in China(read about it here). That's right - the next time you whip your iPhone out - remember that it was assembled by a Chinese kid who didn't have the same privilege as you do - which you choose to use for taking duck faced selfies and scroll through your pointless, baseless, mundane social media which comes back to haunt you with the realization that you're doing nothing with your life while also giving you depression. Ha!
Mr. Gervais made a joke that if tomorrow, ISIS came out with a streaming service, the actors in the audience would work with it too, no questions asked. He also took digs at the prevalent hypocrisy in the industry and remarked, "Birdbox is a movie where people survive by acting like they don't see a thing. Sort of like working for Harvey Weinstein." He ended the monologue by advising the people who win an award to not use the platform for giving any political speeches or tell the public anything, but accept their little awards and get lost because they "know nothing about the real world"
To everyone rich and famous, I'd say, a straight 'Fuck Off' would've sufficed, but roasting an audience as elite as the Globes and being super unapologetic, I've got to hand it to Mr. Gervais. What balls of steel. And even though I am no Ricky Gervais, hell, I am a nobody. I can barely stand straight in front of a huge audience, and I stutter when I'm too nervous, barely a graduate, with no penchant for law or legal studies, an absolute good for nothing, parent-dependent being with barely any friends or substantial weight (I weigh 40 kilos only), I stand here, and I refuse to stay quiet. Or bow down. I've had enough of these phony people's bullshit who've already sold their souls to corporate greed and consumerism, and I challenge all of them - to give a shit. About our receding sense of humanity, our world which is literally burning, the toxicity in the food, in the air and in the mind. And I challenge them to do something about it. In the end, I might be alone, and might die hungry, but I'll die with no regrets. I trust the human race to not go to shit. And if you, just you do something, anything - it won't.
Fuck the rich.
I'm just reiterating. The OG-fuck-the-rich-badass award goes to Rousseau. Remember what he said -
"When the people shall have nothing more to eat, they'll eat the rich."
I was gonna pull an Adam Sandler and start with a "whazzzzzaaaa" because that's how excited I am for the new year (I'm lying, of course) but I realized just because I'm demented doesn't mean I gotta sound demented too.
REFERENCE - because I can't let go of the dying law student inside me:
'whazzzzzzaaa' is from the movie That's My Boy which features a High School teacher being impregnated by a teenage student and is from back when our favorite family man Milo Ventimiglia ( Jack Pearson from This Is Us) used to fuck his sister.
'whazzzzzzaaa' is from the movie That's My Boy which features a High School teacher being impregnated by a teenage student and is from back when our favorite family man Milo Ventimiglia ( Jack Pearson from This Is Us) used to fuck his sister.
Yeah, gonna cut down on the bullshit and tell you like it is - the past couple days were super hard on me. No, I didn't starve or die or anything. Just the usual dysfunctional family bullcrap raining down my fantasy world. Depression is like listening to a Lana Del Rey song - you have no fucking idea what's it about, but its disturbing and calming at the same time, so you sorta go along with it. After three days of crying for no reason and staring contests with the ceiling, I put on my big girl panties, got on my laptop (which I've decided to call Ru by the way), and did what my middle class fam does - write long rants about why my life sucks, screen my messages and cry/shag myself to sleep . Because, you know, unlike rich people, we do not have the luxury of affording expensive shrinks and running off to exotic locations to get over a bad mood. I really wish we could, though. I'd like to see the world once before you rich people burn the globe down with your whims and fancies.
So, Morticia, what are you mad about today?
I'm mad at the world. No, I'm angry at the world. About everything that's going on and how people with the most money are least concerned with doing something, anything. You know why? I'll tell you why.
Because when everything ends, they won't. They'll buy their way into new beginnings.
Because while my brothers and sisters are out there in the cold - fighting the system with blood on their knees, they sit comfortably in their homes, pretending all is good.
Because when our world burns, and it will, they will already have moved into a new one- guess how: money.
And here we are, with blindfolds over our eyes, letting them tell us what's good for us, asking us to buy their 'almost a ho' cosmetics and the age old 'love yourself' propaganda. I feel sorry for all the people who've wasted their money buying all that Kylie Cosmetics/KKW crap because it is what it is - crap. And some of you are so fucking blind that one day you'll call Kylie out for pretending to wash her face using a product from her own beauty line, and buy even more products the next time they're launched, like your life depended on it. I mean - Bitch doesn't even use it herself and she tells you to buy it and you buy it?? What kind of stupid moron does that? You really think those people are talented or hard working? All they do is con people into buying their shit and misappropriate black culture. And don't even get me started about the time people in the US wanted to donate to Kylie Jenner's bank account so she could be the world's youngest billionaire. I mean, you would rather pay money to someone who's only accomplishment (if you can even call it that) was getting pregnant at 19 than donate to something which counts as a real problem - like people dying of starvation, or not getting vaccinated because of limited resources, or women getting infections from using cloth napkins during periods. Is that the standard you want to set in young women of today - get pregnant at 19? Wow.
Have you ever imagined what would happen if you chose to buy from a local store instead of people whose brain size is inversely proportional to the sizes of their rears and who claim to call themselves 'entrepreneurs'? The money you pay for almost 5 times cheaper cosmetics would go into paying a kid's school fee, or buying them fresh fruits, or getting them a proper, balanced meal. But na, why do that when you can line up the wallets of the already rich assholes who wouldn't give a shit if your family got killed in a nuclear blast tomorrow? Yeah. Do that.
And I'm not just after the Kardashian/Jenners. Like I said - they personally have no fucking clue about what they're supposed to be doing. They're just a marketing by-product birthed by their mom-ager Kris. I want to drag every big name who ever had a chance to make the difference and chose to keep their piehole shut so as to not align themselves with a side or be politically incorrect.
Maybe not all celebrities are like that. Let's talk about the most recent example - Jennifer Aniston, Cate Blanchett and Joaquin Phoenix took the Golden Globes' podium to talk about climate change and the Australian bushfires. Phoenix also went a step ahead and asked his fellow glitterati to refrain from taking their private jets to Palm Springs and other award ceremony destinations. Also, did you know that private jets account for about FORTY TIMES more pollution of the air than commercial aircrafts?(here's the source) I don't know about you, but this makes me really mad. I mean, not taking public transport is one thing, but being responsible for emanating carbon emissions which are more than an entire village combined is a totally different ballgame. Do you realize you're being poisoned for free - so that the 1% of the population can afford the most luxurious air travel? Does that make you mad? It fucking should.
And by the way, if you think I'm impressed or in awe or admiration of these people speaking about something important for a change - I'm not. Would you admire a dentist for filling out the cavities in your teeth? No, right? And why is that? Because it's their goddamn job.
But this is what most of these shitty people do - a statement here and a tweet there - but nothing with substantial weight. Of course, I'm not generalizing here there are some amazing people out there doing Satan's good work, but you're not a toddler. I don't have to explain everything to you. They're just - to put in Mr. Shashi Tharoor's words, 'exasperating farrago of distortions, misrepresentations and outright lies'.
You'd think that when there are millions and billions of people following you and looking up to you, you'd make use of that kind of power and do something worthwhile - like poverty eradication or speak about how fundamental rights are in the gutter or how the governments are so freely indulging in privacy violation; instead, bitches just open beauty/clothing/fragrance lines. What the fuck?
And even though I hate Ricky Gervais for being an entitled white asshole who makes sexist and homophobic comments every now and then, I respect him for calling these people out in his seven minute long opening monologue at the Globes(watch it here). In particular, he talked about how Apple had jumped into the streaming biz with the likes of The Morning Show ( starring our favorites - Reese Witherspoon, Steve Carell and Jennifer Aniston) - a show that talks about dignity and doing the right thing while their employer runs sweatshops in China(read about it here). That's right - the next time you whip your iPhone out - remember that it was assembled by a Chinese kid who didn't have the same privilege as you do - which you choose to use for taking duck faced selfies and scroll through your pointless, baseless, mundane social media which comes back to haunt you with the realization that you're doing nothing with your life while also giving you depression. Ha!
Mr. Gervais made a joke that if tomorrow, ISIS came out with a streaming service, the actors in the audience would work with it too, no questions asked. He also took digs at the prevalent hypocrisy in the industry and remarked, "Birdbox is a movie where people survive by acting like they don't see a thing. Sort of like working for Harvey Weinstein." He ended the monologue by advising the people who win an award to not use the platform for giving any political speeches or tell the public anything, but accept their little awards and get lost because they "know nothing about the real world"
To everyone rich and famous, I'd say, a straight 'Fuck Off' would've sufficed, but roasting an audience as elite as the Globes and being super unapologetic, I've got to hand it to Mr. Gervais. What balls of steel. And even though I am no Ricky Gervais, hell, I am a nobody. I can barely stand straight in front of a huge audience, and I stutter when I'm too nervous, barely a graduate, with no penchant for law or legal studies, an absolute good for nothing, parent-dependent being with barely any friends or substantial weight (I weigh 40 kilos only), I stand here, and I refuse to stay quiet. Or bow down. I've had enough of these phony people's bullshit who've already sold their souls to corporate greed and consumerism, and I challenge all of them - to give a shit. About our receding sense of humanity, our world which is literally burning, the toxicity in the food, in the air and in the mind. And I challenge them to do something about it. In the end, I might be alone, and might die hungry, but I'll die with no regrets. I trust the human race to not go to shit. And if you, just you do something, anything - it won't.
And to everyone else, all I can say is - we gotta start giving a shit. Do whatever you have to do to earn your bread, but when the elite come and ask you to buy their shit, say no. I mean, what are they gonna do if no one goes to see their movies? Or if nobody buys their products? Imagine the headache it'll cause from you unfollowing them on Instagram alone. Wait and see. Remember, they might have the money, but we got the numbers, and there's strength in numbers. We're the ones who make these 1%, the top 1%. We make them rich. Remember, we run the world. Not girls, and certainly not Beyonce. I respect her hustle, but in all honesty, she's just another mute spectator to everything going wrong in the world.
Fuck the rich.
I'm just reiterating. The OG-fuck-the-rich-badass award goes to Rousseau. Remember what he said -
"When the people shall have nothing more to eat, they'll eat the rich."
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